Some of it was mean-funny and her delivery there was always effortless. With who's vagina? Santana and Naya Rivera changed my life as a young brown queer and I will always be grateful. Theyre so familiar with each other, the same interests and the same enemies. like a lot of you guys, Ive been thinking so much about Naya & Santana and what they both meant to me all week, and then earlier tonight I think I realized something. Santana to Mr. Schuester and Emma, Showmance. How does that sound? I like how you guys pretend to be all accepting about everything but when your friend suddenly shows up in your home, moves in and goes through all your stuff you're offended. When it comes on you scream and you jump and you dance like a kid to this timeless and utterly perfect pop song. Yeah, its beautiful, but someones gotta help her cross the street, Santana: Britt, I want to talk about, you know, that thing we never talk about. Amber Riley and Naya Riveras voices together are raw power. Santana: Hey Andrew McCarthy, dont know if you heard but Blaine may lose an eye, the same Blaine who was just besties with you not four months ago. And I need to tell you something that I dont know how to say. Or maybe it Santana: No, not really. I'm from Lima Heights Adjacent and I'm proud! Unmatched sass and the best . Wait, somethings definitely wrong. Rachel: You had no right. Santana: I don't really talk during. She gave so much to this character even when the writers were preoccupied with the other more obvious underdogs. (slaps Quinn across face) Quinn: You can't hit me! I want to shine and be seen as the star I am. But in the meantime, I do have one more wish. Santana, Tina and Will, Silly Love Songs. Those arent generic Latinx details. obsession with old people that causes you to skulk around nursing homes Nobody no, nobody is gonna rain on my parade.. Im just too tired. That show was messy, but as a baby gay, Santana was everythingggg. We joined Cheerios together, we joined Glee club together, we all slept with Puckerman the same year. If its not, well, I dont even know. So many of these scenes still eviscerate me and remain among my favorite pieces of lesbian content. Were almost ten years later and Ill never forget her cadence as she says it, the hurt that flashes across her face. by saphireheart12 on desktop and mobile. You better believe theyll regret it. You told everyone I played for another team on your ridiculous melted cheese show! It was resolution. She talked about him yesterday and practically sprayed the choir room. one with. In the original, the unicorn was riding you. And they GET to dance with each other? Santana: Love stinks. Like damn, I am so gay but those two dancing does something to me. We saw that throughout Kurt and Santanas extended coming outs and we couldve seen it more if Santana was given space to date and be her own character in the backhalf of the show. Its pure joy and when I think of Naya Rivera as Santana Lopez what I feel is joy. Brittany: Yeah, he's from Ireland. Coming out isnt always rainbows and parades. I love you a-and I don't want to be with Sam or Finn or any of those other guys. Quinn: Do you want me to slap you again? Maybe in junior college. And while coming to terms with her sexuality and feelings for Brittany certainly softened her and always and especially with Brittany herself it never weakened her resolve or ability to deliver a devastating verbal barb with the precision of an assassin. Brittany: God, I'm so sad. Santana: Rachel, your mustache is thicker than a Middle Eastern dictator. You told coach Sylvester about my summer surgery! So youre gonna grant me a wish, Thats right, double-stuffed, fatty, gassy, mcgravy pants, we are just one big happy, happy family, I did not just leave one diva-driven glee club to join another, so let me write you a reality check, Richie Bitch. You know what? Maybe Blaine got tired of hearing your shrill, self-aggrandizing lecture about how you felt the two of you were at the very apex of the gay rights movement every time you so much as cooked macaroni and cheese together or farted. You're gonna be okay. Maybe I need someone who knows more than three dance moves: "the finger wag", "the shoulder shimmy" and the one where you pretend to twirl two invisible rainbow-colored ribbons attached to your hips. I was such a great fan of Glee. Kurt and Santana, The Rocky Horror Glee Show. You've been berating us for the better part of an hour. Look, I don't mean to be a bitchwell actually I do. By that point I had felt that way for years. Im a star. Im gonna be an outsider my whole life. Enby is a Black/Trans owned company run by 3 enby's that believes that all bodies deserve affirmation and pleasure. I never understood why, why any girl would choose a stupid boy. Until, like Santana, I did. Of course Santana clocks Quinns flirting the second she starts it. Santana and Sue Sylvester, The Spanish Teacher, You went from La Cucaracha to a bullfighting mariachi. The way shes afraid to look up off the floor and into the choir room. It fit. The details of my journey were pretty different from Santanas, but the feelings were the same. Though I don't know whose toxic vagina would need that much of that stuff, I mean if you're producing that much yeast you should probably start a bakery. QUARANTINE MADE ME MONOLOGUE!Aspiring Actor/Singer Tommy Ratkiewicz-Stierwalt, releases covers every Monday, Wednesday and Friday! You're about as sexy as a Cabbage Patch Kid. They may have love, but you know what we are that they are not? With whose vagina? is a personal favorite. Her off white blouse. It's more of my speed. You tell Marley she's fat, even though your face looks like a soccer ball. Oh ok. Santana about Rachel and Kurt, Girls (and Boys) on Film. Santana: Is that because you've been telling her to? of the gay rights movement every time you so much as cooked macaroni and Brittany to Kitty, Guilty Pleasures. Santana after seeing the shirt Brittany made for her, Born This Way. Did you know she tried to sell me once? Her ability to speak truth to power and call teachers (adults!) I hope Naya knew the impact she had, or she can at least see it now. Hamburglar Finn is fine. Or Tribeca. Just like that she can go from breaking your heart to making you laugh. Standing ovation for Miss Naya Rivera Her relationships with men sometimes become more misandric than romantic in retrospect. In doing so, they revealed a rarely-discussed but entirely valid coming out narrative. This is my least favorite episode of Glee. And Naya brought that same joy, that same energy, to the Glee Live tour and I got to be in the very same room with her while she sang that song, and its a memory Ill likely never forget. MIKE: Is that why you're wearing blue contacts today, Tina? (sings in background) Mr. #filmacting Not only am I giving you full visitation rights to the set of rambunctious twins that live on my rib cage, you get the chance to show that pastry bag Finn that he cant mess with Sam Evans. And frankly, being on the Cheerios isn't the same without you. She looks to Brittany, she remembers their dreams that came true and then the rumors have it that ruined them all. #monologues Brittany: [smiles and holds Santana's hand] How did that marriage work out for you. mozzart jackpot winners yesterday; new mandela effects 2021; how to delete a payee on barclays app Wed love to read your favorite memories in the comments. Thank you, Finn, especially. I think somebody needs to freeze the fat this Christmas, because somebody weighs more than Mrs. Claus!. No one gives a damn about you. You are the unicorn. Its just something thats always been inside of me and I really want to share it with you because I love you so much. The strive to create a safer, and more comfortable sex-toy shopping experience for the Queer community and more specifically gender non-conforming, trans and non-binary people. And if there's any controversy that interferes with my presidential campaign, then I'll use one of my leprechaun wishes. Santana to Rachel, Extraordinary Merry Christmas, Will: Okay, come on ladies, it's not like this is the first time I've ever proposed. Monologues For Teens - Glee: Santana - Wattpad Wattpad scheduled for offline maintenance On Tuesday, January 10 between 10:00 AM and 12:00 PM UTC (5:00 - 7:00 AM EST), Wattpad will be down for 2 hours to perform a database upgrade, in an effort to improve stability and performance issues. If everyone just put out, we would have a winning football team. She seems to be condoning this in the face of all logic. I'm attracted to girls, and I'm attracted to guys. So please make sure your monologue is within . Shes beautiful, shes innocent, shes everything thats good in this miserable, stinking world. Heres Naya Rivera, this Black Puerto Rican actress who fought so hard against the producers for Santanas coming out in the first place. Santana: Hey Finnocence. Santana: I'm not! Santana: Well that outfit isnt helping. Privacy Policy. Santana about Rachel, when Rachel wins the MVP Glee Club Award, Original Song. As soon as we get to New York Im bailing to live in a lesbian colony, she continues. Brittany to Kitty, Guilty Pleasures. Santana Monologue Glee Shack's Advocate Play over 265 million tracks for free on SoundCloud. I taped it to my under-boob, If Kurt wouldve taped this to his junk, I never wouldve heard the end of it. I always thought Naya deserved the best actress award just for the scene alone. I love Santanas relationship with Brittany because obviously Brittana 4 Ever, but I also love how Santana is able to be vulnerable with Brittany in a way she wouldnt be with anyone else. Please tell me that is a roll of Certs in your pocket. All those in favor of voting Rachel down a second time? But I won't join without you. I will never understand why these things happen. I have razor blades hidden in my hair. In my opinion, this scene/song is one of the most underrated of the Glee canon. I should know, I slept with you. Santana: Al Roker is disgusting by the way. TINA: That's extraordinarily racist. What is this, hmm? Of course they have fake IDs. The Autostraddle TV Team is made up of Riese Bernard, Carmen Phillips, Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya, Valerie Anne, Natalie, Drew Burnett Gregory, Shelli Nicole, Nic, A. Tony Jerome, and Heather Hogan. Santana: Completely! You are not my principal. I will always be grateful to her for the major part she played in my coming out. You are a horrible person who never had a nice word to say about Finn Hudson, so dont you dare think for a second that he didn't hate you, too! And I'm definitely sure Tina has looked into getting an eye de-slanting. Sabes lo que pasa en Lima Heights Adjacent? Are you sure it just isn't Britney 3.0 week in Glee club? Santana: You are so cool. Santana to Quinn about Marley and Kitty, Thanksgiving. Quinn: And we're here to apologize to Quinn for slapping her across the face very very hard. Santana was my favorite long before the jokes about her and Brittany sleeping together turned into the best friends in love storyline of my dreams. I dont want to fight anymore. SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM FOR THE VIDEOS THAT PEOPLE HAVE LINKED IN THE . But Glee encouraged me to let me freak flag fly, and so I did. Santana: (To Finn) Hey Orca! Lady Hummel called begging us to do an emergency intervention. Finn: Look, I appreciate the offer, but I have feelings for someone else and I'm trying to work it out with them. Im kind of like the Incredible Hulk. When Santana and Brittany take her song and flip the pronouns and wear the slinky tube dresses and wrap their curled hair in big bows and it rains glitter and are surrounded by cheerleaders, one of whom has a very alternative lifestyle haircut, and they want to dance with each other? Santana to Mr. Schuester, The Rocky Horror Glee Show. One of my favourites is the group phone call in Season 1 where Santana says Sex is not dating and Brittany says If it was, Santana and I would be dating The fear in Nayas eyes it was those kind of small choices and background acting that led people to ship Brittana, and for Santana to become more than the bitchy cheerleader. Santana: Yes, we can. Santana: No, you're lying. Admit you put something in that slushie, what was it, huh, glass, asphalt? Finn: Because I love her and I don't want to hurt her. Santana: It is a Carrot Top convention. And it worked. I got Sebastian on tape admitting there was rock salt in that slushie that blinded Blaine. You know, we always were two ends of the same bitch-goddess spectrum. It's gonna be okay. Sebastian: And what did you think Sha-Queer-A? Maybe he got tired of watching you drape yourself on every piano you happen to pass to entertain exactly no one with, say, some song that Judy Garland choked on her tongue in the middle of or some sassy old Broadway standard made famous by another dead alcoholic crone. Of all those famous tirades and one-liners, none warms my heart like The only straight I am, is straight up Bitch.. Does he get so turned on by teen moms who barely visit their kid? Its the single most thrilling three minutes the Glee ever produced. I mean, after all, that's why it didn't work out with you and Blaine, right? which means I have a killer health plan which pays for everything. I cant believe its been ten years since this moments happened. There was always a stupid boy and he never treated her the same way I would. They were trees falling in a forest and with nobody around to hear them, my desire often faded. Santana: That is the lamest thing I didn't understand a word of. Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window). Brittany: I don't want to known as a quitter. Its the tiny blue dress. A sex-tape that follows me around to this very day.Look up at my in the internet right now. Santana: Just because I hate everyone doesn't mean they have to hate me too. No Trouty Mouth? Brittany: OK. Puck's super fine. Emmy Rossum is. rainbow-colored ribbons attached to your hips, so you know what, maybe Also, she thinks youre a spritely, green, mythological creature, but I know youre a potato-eating poser. It was then as it is now, I love you, I love you, I love you, like never before. And we'd like more please. This whole episode is legit queer culture. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. It was like being smothered by a sweaty, out-of-breath sack of potatoes that someone soaked in body spray. Naya as Santana as a happy lady with a yeast infection, inside a commercial, inside a phone shes holding to proudly share her triumph with Rachel. Ive found myself revisiting this clip more than any other this past week. Bartender: Sorry ladies, can I see some IDs? You're not fat. Yeah, earlier today Artie asked if he could make a gigantic omelet when Im done with the ostrich eggs Im smuggling in my bra. It sucked. It was that damn Trouty Mouth. Santana leaves it all at Brittanys feet in that choir room, and so did Naya. Can I talk to you for a second? Santana: And Pablo Escobar? You wanna play with me, Kurt? You are a beautiful person. Santana: Y-you think that Great Gazoo kid is a leprechaun? I remember early in my coming-out-to-myself period I was hooking up with a girl in relative secrecy for reasons irrelevant right now, but it was strange to me how easily I kept the secret and kept wanting to do it. Theyre getting off work just as the sun is coming up, because this is a Beatles-themed episode and someone needed to sing Here Comes the Sun. And also because its really adorable and romantic. Santana: Yes I did. So glad you're back, I've never seen a smile that big since a claymation abominable snowman got his teeth pulled by that little gay elf dentist. And I don't like Green Eggs and Ham. Did Naya adlib? Santana: What did you just say to her? I call her Snix. What if I just told your BFF about her BF and his man-whoring ways? It's like Eli Roth decided to make a gay horror movie, and this is the scene right before we eat each other. No matter how rich, or famous or successful I become, when it comes to you, I'm always going to be that moon-eyed girl who freaked you out at a first glee rehearsal. One time Becky Jackson left a piece of chocolate birthday cake on my chair and when I sat on it, it looked like I had pooped my pants, so Finn walked behind me until I could get out of school so no one saw my chocolate butt and thought I had messed myself. Maybe Blaine woke up one day and said, 'You know what, I don't wanna marry a sexless self-centered baton-twirler. Me freak flag fly, and this is the lamest thing I did understand. The writers were preoccupied with the other more obvious underdogs myself revisiting glee monologues santana clip more than other... 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